Boondock Saints 2 Review

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HA! I tricked you. There is no review. Because I didn't get to see it!

My friends and I were obsessed with the original Boondock Saints, and for good reason. It was violent, funny, and the main characters were fucking Irish brothers. You can't go wrong with the Irish! Every guy wanted to be like the MacManus Brothers. Have a fuggin awesome accent and kill people that did wrong. That's right. If you haven't seen the movie the "Saints" decided they would go around and kill everyone who they felt did wrong in the world. Like murders, pedophiles, and pimps. It's like a superhero without morals.

Now I would take the more Spider-Man route if I could and just bust criminals and leave them dangling from a web for the cops to find and arrest. I could never really kill a person, but the Boondock Saints did and it was edgy as fuck. Which made it such an interesting movie. But I'm getting off topic. It took a decade for the sequel to come out. Most of us gave up hope on the whole thing, but now here it is, in limited theater release. Sadly only a few of my close friends were able to go see it so we set off to one of the few theaters playing it.


So my friends and I were running a bit late. The movie started at 7:50 and we got there right around 8. We figured we had just missed the previews so we weren't too upset. But once we entered the lobby of the theater it was mass hysteria!! The lobby was a complete mess! I had originally thought we were going to the Indie Theater down the street for Boondock, but apparently I was wrong and we were in the GINORMOUS GENERAL PUBLIC THEATER! This theater as so huge that while I was looking for a much needed restroom I had to take the stairs that were about as long as a DC Metro escalator...

But anyway, the line to get tickets was ridiculous. One of my friends and I were drunk and so we were confused, but our buddy who drove us was sober enough to point out the fact "It's opening night for New Moon"
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New Moon???

New Moon????

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


Yes sadly, it was true. It was the opening night of New Moon. We were surrounded by Tweens and Middle Aged Women unsatisfied by their marriages. It was a sight to behold! But the worst part was that even though we were late to our movie, we had to sit in the same line as the Twilight people! That's right, it was all one big line to the ticket booth.

I call bullshit!! I am a geek boy. We all know this. So whenever there is a big geek movie (Star Wars, Spider-Man, X-Men etc) there is always a separate line for them because the movie is so huge! Well apparently it wasn't the case for this theater. If you wanted to see the limited release for Boondock Saints 2 then you would have had to arrive at the theater early on like the rest of the New Moon crowd. Not only that, there were like 15 other movies out in that theater that night and if you were a poor soul not seeing New Moon, good luck catching your flick!


I'm sure it was just this theater that was being retarded, but I mean, come on. Put the mass public in a separate line (like I'm used to being in for my geek movies) so the kids can go see Planet 51 or The Christmas Carol!


So annoying...