Friday, June 19, 2009


Man I'm sidetracking again. But it's best to get out the feelings while they are with me, right? And that means more blogs for you guys. Two Bad Neighbors part 2 will come when it comes...

I can't fucking stand spiders. I downright loathe them. And the sick irony that I love Spider-man is not lost on me, but that's a post for another time.

So now it's warm again here in Maryland and that means the bugs and spiders are out and about. The breezeway leading to my apartment door is a bug haven with all the light on at night. Most of these bugs don't really bother me too much, but it's the spiders that make me want to jump off my third floor balcony and plummet to my doom. Lucky for me she hasn't shown her face since last year (though her web nest is STILL HERE, I will take a picture to prove) but the spider my brother and I named Shelob is absent. She made her nest not 10 feet from out door. Our home!!

Shelob exists by the way. Google it and enjoy. It wasn't just Frodo and Samwise she desired...

Shelob was a gigantress that made my brother and I fear walking to our own front door. While we haven't seen her yet, I'm sure her spawn are creeping into our condo and that doesn't help the fact I can't sleep at night.

So tonight I was walking Kenobi (my dog) and at night he has a habit of walking real close to trees. During the cold season this is fine, but now that it's summer I kinda forgot about the webbing I'm supposed to avoid. So obviously what do I do? I get pulled into some sort of spiderweb and freak the hell out. It sends shivers down my spine. I took my dog out because I know he needed to poop but he walked me right into a death trap of web that had me ALMOST running and screaming to my apartment. I calmly waited for him to do his dirty work while in the meantime I patted down my whole body while making the "pfffh pfffh" sound trying to get any type of webbing away from my mouth. I caught a glimpse of a neighbor lady opening her blinds to see what was up. I said "Sorry" and she closed the blinds. I must have looked pretty dumb but I didn't care at the moment.

My main priority was dragging my dog up 2 flights of stairs to our home so I could jump in the shower and get whatever webbing was on me.....OFF. I honestly cannot sleep or do anything unless I am absolutely positive that there is no webbing (or spiders) on me. My shower is a quarantine of sorts.

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