I'm just gonna type and see where this goes...


Having one of those moments where I just need to get my thoughts down on paper (computer?) as it calms my nerves and allows me to vent. This whole Colorado Batman Shooting just hit me in a strange way. I constantly bitch and moan about the obnoxious people I see every day blocking handicap ramps with their cars so the old lady in the wheelchair can't get up the curb or the jerkoff who drives into oncoming traffic because he's was texing on his phone. But that's just plain stupidity, and sadly, we often just shrug it off because stupidity has become the norm. "Why did he just do that?" "Because he's an inconsiderate idiot." "Ohhh yeah..." But what happened in Colorado is something I can't really wrap my head around. The latest news I read about the shooting mentioned the youngest killed in the attack was a 6 year old girl and my heart just broke. 


6 years old. And she was shot and killed. Cause she went to go see Batman. 


It was nauseating to just type that. 


The girl's mother was shot in the throat and abdomen, was paralyzed in critical condition and was not informed of her daughter's death until later.


I guess when I first heard of the shooting the thought of small children being involved didn't enter my mind considering the movie was at midnight. Then I thought back to the experience at my midnight premiere. People of all ages, shapes, and sizes had all gathered together for a common love of something. I remember staring at the snake-like mass that seemed to wrap itself around two floors of a lobby and being overwhelmed at how awesome it was that we were all here for the same reasons. The "Sean of Old", as he will be referred, would think they were all a bunch of phonies, Holden Caulfield style. "These people don't like Batman like I like Batman," he'd shout. "They're just hopping on the comic book bandwagon!" Because back then I was a geek before being a geek was considered "cool." But I don't view things that way anymore and that night for me, seeing Batman on the big screen hit me on an emotional level for several different (personal) reasons which I will go into more detail in a future post. 


So who would have thought that a theater of people doing the exact same thing I was 1500 miles away would have such a tragic experience?


The moment it all became REAL to me was a screenshot someone posted of a woman's Twitter feed expressing her excitement to see Batman. A similar picture next to it was of a man, a friend of the woman, tweeting to her to see if she was OK. He had heard about the shooting, knew his friend was at that theater, and she was worried because she wasn't answering her phone.


There's reading the news articles of the people involved and then there's reading their actual Twitter feeds. The last thing the girl posted was "MOVIE DOESN'T START FOR 20 MINUTES." That was 3 days ago and it hasn't updated since. 


As a means of remembering her name, or seeing if family would post on her behalf, I added her to my Twitter even though I knew she was gone. The next day I saw actress Marlee Matlin recommend we all "follow" her on Twitter to show our support. Having already been following I was aware she had a decent number of followers but that number skyrocketed the past few days by 20,000. Even going from 27,500 to 28,004 just while typing this. Incredible. It doesn't seem like much but if I were one of her family members and I saw those numbers it would show me how much people actually cared.


Doing a little research, however, I found something rather disturbing and made me feel sick all over again. This woman, Jessica, was shot and killed in the theater just a MONTH after narrowly escaping another shooting at her local mall! What in the hell is going on here?! She's been in not one but two horrific gun incidents in the span of a month. Here is the link to her blog about the first shooting and her thoughts on the aftermath...


Jessica's Blog


Could you imagine surviving an experience like that only to have it happen all over again? 


I will never know what possesses people to do the things they do. All I know is that I live my life every day knowing I surround myself with great friends, an amazing family, and that no matter how bad life can get I  always have someone to turn to.


Not someone to turn on...

Phone Test

So this is a test. I have acquired a Blogger App for my Droid and am typing this to you from work.

Since Im at work I will post a work related picture of my coworker with an extremely tall individual...

Midnight

I've decided to keep a log while I'm taking care of my friend's cat...

9:57 AM
Friend drops off cat at my house along with food, litter box, treats, and other assorted cat goodies. The cat, Midnight, casts cold, dark stares in my direction. His fur, as black as the cape off a Sith Lord, shines from the rays of sunlight creeping through the nearby window. I am assured by my friend I have nothing to worry about and that we will have a "great time" though I am skeptical. A quick glance into Midnight's yellow eyes tells me to feel differently.

10:07 AM
Friend asks what my plans are for the day and although my back is in crucial pain, I jokingly mention the cat and I will play "Circle of Life." A slight chill ran down my neck as soon as the words escaped my lips as Midnight shot me a look that could only translate to "The fuck we are." It was so quick I couldn't be certain and just chalked it up to my imagination.

12:02 PM
My "decorative" Spider-man pillow mysteriously moved from the couch to my bed. Cat is unfazed but seems to relish in my confusion.

12:46 PM
Spider-man pillow now flipped over from Spider-man Red side to Spider-man Black Suit side in what I can only assume is some cryptic message foreshadowing my future downfall.

3:47 PM
While playing Fallout: New Vegas I left the Playstation 3 paused for a moment while I visited the restroom. Upon my return, a save file had been deleted and my character had lost 15 karma points for detonating a rocket. Midnight, perched on the television set, rested peacefully...

6:01 PM
I return home from the grocery store to the aroma of freshly baked.... something. As I rounded the corner I was surprised to find a warm pizza waiting for me on the kitchen table, a Monster Energy Drink can, already opened, sat next to it, beads of condensation dripping down the sides. Assuming my room mate had returned home from work and had cooked himself a nice dinner, I was shocked to immediately hear the front door unlock and my room mate stroll in behind me. I asked him if the pizza was his and he explained he had been at work all day and was just now arriving home. Not wanting to sound crazy, I admitted to making it myself, and introduced him to our new house guest Midnight, who was playfully batting around the Spider-man pillow on the couch.

The same Spider-man pillow that is normally upstairs...

Amazing Spider-man

People keep asking me what I thought of the new Spider-man movie and I have no idea why *eyeroll* so I figured it be easier to share here. To put it simply, I loved it.

Ohh surprise surprise! Sean loved a Spider-man movie, no shocker there. Well, let me explain something first. I don't know exactly how to put it into words to be honest, but I view things differently in sobriety. I've become less obsessive over things like this. In the past, I would be counting down the days til a new Spider-man movie was coming out. Or watching the Avengers trailer 100 times a day analyzing it until the premiere. But I didn't do any of that.

Yeah, I grew up. Who knew?

It's weird right? But don't let that scare you. I obviously still love all these things, that will never change, I am just now enjoying it on a more normal, healthy level. Ya get me? Though if my Facebook/Twitter is any indication, Star Wars is still a daily part of my life. So that said, I went into Spider-man with only seeing the trailer about 3 times. I didn't read all the articles online, leaked photos, magazines or anything. I went into the theater knowing as much as the Average Joe. Well, maybe above average (truth.)


What I did know going in was there would be a lot of Peter Parker over Spider-man as they decided to do some new, revamped origin story involving his parents. That's all well and good and all, but did we really need the origin story AGAIN? Even people who don't care about Spidey know his origin.


Spider bite, powers, great power, great responsibility, etc...


But from here on out there will be SPOILERS regarding the new film...

Not many people can say "I can jump from here.... and live!"

Alright, now let's get into this. Like I mentioned, I didn't think another origin story was necessary but their take on this was enough to grab my attention. Peter's parents, Richard and Mary, aren't spoken of much in the comic books so here they are trying to give us some "untold story" into their past, their connection with Oscorp, and their mysterious death. This movie is the first in an already planned trilogy, so here they are merely planting the seeds of mystery. I wasn't "wowed" by these scenes, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little curious on this take in the Spidey mythos. Discussing with a friend of mine, he mentioned he doesn't remember this from the comics. That's because it's not. Like Batman Begins, it's a different take on the origin which for me, I'll accept because, to put it simply... it's different. It's NEW and it's different. I don't need an exact retread of the story all over again. Change it up. Keep me on my toes. 

The wrestling match from the comics/original movie? Not here.

Mary Jane? No sir

Gwen Stacey? Oh god yes..

The biggest plus for me is having Gwen over Mary Jane. While not my ideal candidate for the character I do have to admit Emma Stone nailed it out of the park here (knee highs and that hairband? Dear lord...). It is impossible not to fall for her in this flick as she's infectiously adorable. Her scenes with Peter are some of the best in the movie. But I'm sure most are wondering why Gwen over Mary Jane Watson. Simple. Gwen was Spidey's first true love. MJ was chosen for the original trilogy because she's the most recognizable. It's a popularity contest, really. You have to give the audience something they are familiar with or they are going to be confused. Which leads us to the biggest and most fantastic change over the original films...

Mechanical Web-shooters.

This single-handedly made the movie for me because not only did it show him with the mechanical web-shooters (like it's supposed to be) but it portrays Peter as the genius he really is. So why did they make the web-shooters organic in the originals. Simple. It's an easy sell. People need the simplest answer for why something happens. I had talked to MANY people who had no idea Peter actually created his web-shooters himself. To them, it doesn't make sense. Why should he have to build them? He was bit by a spider that gave him super powers so logically he should be able to shoot webs, right?

This is why it was done in the originals as organic. It's easier to accept. For some reason it makes perfect sense to tell someone all these things are possible because he was bitten by a magical spider. But if you say that Peter was an incredibly smart individual and crafted the mechanics himself, then suddenly that's too much for ones brain to handle.

So as a fanboy, this was a joy for me. Watching him build them, seeing the web cartridges, having the Lizard crush his wrists and breaking them (!!). That was key for me because running out or fluid or having them break is what made Spider-man more vulnerable. 

Oh man, and there's a scene in the sewer where Spider-man actually creates a web formation that he perches on (and plays games on his cell) while waiting for the vibrations in the webbing to point him in the direction of the Lizard. Bloody brilliant.

For now, I will leave it at this. It's getting way too hot sitting here at the computer but I will continue this another day, preferably after seeing the film again which I plan on doing soon...

This Job Would be Great if...

Here is where I will share some of the daily interactions my staff and I have with our customers...

This one is in regards to the glowing neon OPEN sign we have in the window...

Customer: I came here the other day and you guys were closed.
Coworker: Yeah we had to do maintenance on our machine for a few days.
Customer: But I saw the OPEN sign in the window.
Coworker: Wait, are you saying my employees left the OPEN sign ON over night?
Customer: No, it wasn't on. I just saw that it was in the window.
Coworker: It's...it's always in the window...

This one happens way more than it should...

Customer tries opening the door to the store but we don't open for another 30 minutes. They look at the store hours on the window sign, check their watch and notice they have 30 minutes til we open, yet continue to try to open the door.

Also...
(Try opening the door before the open. They will continue to try and open the door until I go unlock it and tell them we aren't open yet)
Me: I'm sorry, but we aren't open for another 30 minutes.
Customer: But your sign says you open at 10.
Me: Yes, and it's 9:30 right now.
Customer: *Stares blankly*
Me: That's in 30 minutes...
Customer: *stares blankly*
Me: You're 30 minutes too early...

This is a more recent one that has been occurring and probably one of my favorites because it just proves everything my coworkers and I have been saying for years...

A few months ago they had to take down the sign above our store. We still haven't received a new one so there's just a blank wall above our store. We put up a giant custom made sign in the window AND we still have the glowing neon open sign. And yet, I still get calls like this from the corporate headquarters...

Corporate: Have you guys just been not opening your store? Or opening late or something? We've been getting a lot of calls saying the store is closed.

Me: Alright, let me break this down for you. First and foremost, my coworker and I are here every single morning and we've never opened the store late. The reason people THINK we are closed is this. The sign above the store is missing. Instead of parking the car and checking to see if we are open they just ASSUME we are closed because there is no sign. ALSO, the majority of people who are calling you that we are closed are most likely people who arrive at the store an hour or 2 early when the store actually IS closed. So I can assure you that anybody who has complained that we aren't open is either too lazy to get out of their car to check if we're open OR doesn't grasp the concept that the store doesn't open upon their arrival. We have set hours.


That is one of my biggest pet peeves with the store. These people really, truly believe the world revolves around them and are downright befuddled when I explain the store does not open just because they want/need it to. This is not the way the world works...

Letters from Rehab #5 Finale

So this is the last of the letters I had written but no worries. Reading over these has reminded me of a whole bunch of stuff I can share about in future posts.

Day 8
Welp, I've made it a whole week! Feel fantastic. Finally got to move into the dorms with a sweet lounge area and TV. Could have used that tv on Friday for the Smallville Series finale but no such luck. Still very bitter about that and will probably be pissed for quite sometime. I know it's silly but I love what I love and I love Smallville.


I got to use Star Wars quotes in one of our small 5 person groups the past 2 days in a row. Yesterday a guy said he would "try not to relapse when I leave" and I of course said "Do or do not there is no try." Hahaha My counselor was pleased with my response. Then today a woman mention her fear of relapse to which I said "fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering." God I love being able to use Star Wars quotes and it actually has meaning. Now I'm just waiting for someone to say they wish they could play the Bongos again. In due time...


Day 9
Holy fuck. Last night the girl of my dreams joined the program. Ahhhhhhh. I'm telling you seeing these girls and not being able to touch flirt is criminal. Another really hot girl came in as well and in the first night she all ready got in trouble for flirting with some of the criminals. Now she has to stay 10 feet away from us guys, can't talk to us, for a week. 24 hours and she's already started crap. Luckily "my girl" (haha) doesn't seem like trouble. I know I can't even really talk to her but at least I know I have eye candy for the next few weeks. Somethings gotta give. I feel like I'm going to erupt like that dude from the first Scary Movie.


I just received Doug's # today so I will be giving a call tomorrow to chat real quick (10 min limit) and get ur address so i can send this novel.


-From the pee pee soaked heckhole,


     Seanthings


-And there we have it. I should note I'm not referring to myself as a "pee pee socked heckhole" but that the location from which I am writing is a "pee pee soaked heckhole." Which is of course another Simpsons references that perfectly bookends the letters. Aaaaand scene!

-I remember being genuinely upset that I had missed Smallville. I had really wanted to try and sneak into the dorm to watch it but I didn't want to skip class. Cause skipping class is WRONG!

-What you can't see from these blog transcriptions of the letters is all the scratched out words from the original writing. One of the really noticeable ones is when I'm obviously trying to think of the word "context" when mentioning using the Star Wars quotes and all that comes out after several scratches is "and it actually has meaning." I knew what I wanted to say, but I couldn't get the right words out.

So that's all we have for now. I will continue to share stories that I've now remembered through reminiscing. Basically an overall better feel of what the program was actually like, what we did, and all that stuff. So be on the look out for those.

Letters from Rehab #4

Almost for got to type this up. Though I'm glad I waited because now I'm downloading The Newsroom and this gives me something to do...

Day 7
Last day of detox! Tomorrow morning I move into the dorms, finally! I am so fucking pumped. During my downtime today I saw Jennifer goodbye (hot stuff!) and met her 6'4 huge ass husband. Good god he was scary. Later me and some of the crew sat by the lake and just chilled. We saw all these turtles, frogs, gophers, and the meanest bunch of geese you'll ever meet. The first day I got here the baby geese were so fucking tiny. 7 days later they are getting huge! Interested to see how big they get by the time I leave. We also caught a snapping turtle. Fucker was vicious!


I saw this line in my Alcoholics Anonymous book that I thought I would share...


"The alcoholic is like a tornado roaring his way through the lives of others: hearts are broken. Sweet relationships are dead"


I hope I have in no way hurt any of you. I got out of control. Alcoholism is truly a disease and I hate it.


But in other news, tonight was pretty damn depressing. The night before people leave we have a class where we have a send off. It's really an emotional experience. Everyone gets up and tells their stories and some will just bring you to tears. I'm losing 4 of my good friends tomorrow and my best friend Anthony the day after. they are all older dudes which sadly I relate to more cuz these young kids are fucking punks. Talking to them is like talking to every kid I hated in high school. All they talk about is one-upping each other on who has done the most drugs. Fucking pathetic. And the criminals walk around like they own the place like the jocks did in school. Loud, obnoxious, get the fuck out of my way attitude. Not much you can do about it though! I feel bad for them, really.


We actually had 2 people escape yesterday! They made a break for it and haven't  been seen since. Funny thing is 5 minutes after they bolted we got hit bu a HUGE storm. Those poor bastards were running down the street in the pouring rain. I'm having a great time so I don't see why someone would want to leave. But as Anthony (Yoda) said "When your an addict and you need your shit you fucking will do anything to get it"


They were both coke heads who needed their fix. Craziness.


I'm sure I've mentioned at certain points the giant spider that's outside my condo EVERY year in the same place, who I dubbed Shelob (Lord of the Rings). Well I think she followed me here because she is perched outside my door as we speak. Right next to my bench I sit on every morning. My room mate suggest we find Samwise Gamgee and have him use Sting. No such luck..



-So her name was Jennifer! Haha! I knew I'd remember. (See last post)

-Finding all those wild animals was a cool experience. Reading it over now doesn't do it justice. My typing sounds childish, again, but this time it's fitting. Because at that moment I was seeing the world in a way I hadn't seen in two decades. With wide eyed enthusiasm and innocence.

I watched those baby geese grow everyday I was there. It was like some sick metaphor staring us right in the face the whole time, almost TOO perfect and TOO cliche. As if the staff had planned it all along because as they grew, we grew, and so help me God they actually took to the sky for the very first time the day before I left. Again, super cliche but 100% accurate.

-Yes, there really was an enormous snapping turtle and YES I did say "caught." My buddy Jason took it upon himself to pick it up, shortly after watching it snap a think stick in half in the blink of an eye. Yeah, bad idea.

-That "tornado" line from the AA Book still sticks with me today.

-The criminals really did walk around like they owned the place. And why shouldn't they? Going to prison was the equivalent to being on the football team in high school, ergo, they were "better" than us. Bear with me here as the dynamics of rehab are ass backwards. More on this in a future blog.

-Ahh the escapees. Yes this did happen, more often than not unfortunately. You have to understand that this place was in the middle of nowhere up by the mountains. We were not fenced in and could leave at any time. But there was NO PLACE TO GO. So if someone made a break for it, there wasn't anywhere for you to go for miles and miles. I do not envy the poor guys who escaped that day and got punished by that rain cause it was terrible.

-Now I'll explain Shelob. This is the spider that for many years, parked it's ass right outside the front door of my condo. Every year, when the weather started to get warmer, that monstrosity of an arachnid was blocking the very entrance to my home. MY HOME! (Seinfeld whine) In rehab, when I saw a similar spider in my heavily medicated state of mind, I was absolutely certain the beast had hunted me down to torment me.

That's all for now.